It was a shock. Your wife tells you that she’s in love with somebody else and she wants a divorce. She’s already retained a lawyer. What do you do now?

You’ve asked friends and acquaintances for references of good attorneys, but their recommendations end up either being real estate or patent lawyers or high-priced divorce attorneys who treat divorce like war and promise to “take your wife to the cleaners.” None of these seem to fit the bill.

So, what should you be looking for in a good divorce attorney?  Here are a few suggestions as originally published at divorcemag.com.

1)      Practices family or matrimonial law.

2)      Is connected to other professionals, who may be needed during a divorce (e.g., certified divorce financial analysts, custody/parenting experts, etc.)

3)      Has Relevant Experience in Divorce Court. An old friend from college with no divorce court experience is NOT the right choice. Divorce is a complex process. Having an attorney familiar with the subject matter and with the local court’s rules and judges is important.

4)      Negotiates skillfully. An attorney who can represent your interests and avoid protracted court battles will save you time, stress and money!

5)      Tells you the Truth. You need someone who can tell you if an offer is fair and worth taking rather than someone who tells you what you want to hear and shares your desire to seek revenge.

6)      Is Compatible. You need to be comfortable enough with your attorney that you can respond honestly about questions he/she ask about your mental and physical health and other personal issues that may be relevant to the case.

7)      Is Totally Candid. You’ll want someone who will be up-front with you, not only about the costs of the divorce, but about the problems with your case, how the judge is likely to rule, and if your views appear to sound vindictive.

8)      Has No Conflicts of Interest. You don’t want to share a lawyer with your spouse or hire your spouse’s friends or relatives, creating a conflict of interest for them and trouble for you.

9)      Is More than a Pretty Face. Perhaps it goes without saying, but you should never choose a lawyer based on his/her physical appearance. You should be looking for competence!

Household Cases

Family cases are a type of civil case, but they normally involve problems in between or worrying spouses, moms and dads, and children. Family courts deal with a wide variety of cases including domestic matters. The most common concerns dealt with at family court consist of:

Marital relationship Dissolution. 

When someone wishes to end a marital relationship, they can submit a case at family court to ask for a court order ending the marital relationship. Marital relationships can be ended through divorce or annulment cases. The court can also grant a separation, where the court issues orders concerning property, alimony, and child custody, but the celebrations stay legally married. You can find more info on the Divorce, Annulment, or Separation areas of this site.

Paternity and Kid Custody. 

When a guy needs to be declared the father of a kid, either moms and dad can submit a case asking the family court to identify paternity. This completely develops the dad of the kid. Unmarried moms and dads can also ask the court to purchase legal custody, physical custody, visitation schedules, and kid support. You can find more details about these types of cases on the Custody, Paternity, & Child Support section of this site.

Protection Orders Against Domestic Violence. 

Victims of domestic violence can ask the family court to issue security orders to keep their abuser away. Please visit the DV Security Orders to learn more.

Name Changes. 

A child or an adult may have the ability to legally alter their name through a name change case at family court. Please check out the Name Change area to learn more.

Guardianship.

 Guardianship involves determining who will be accountable for the medical, personal, and monetary decisions over a kid or an adult who can not care for themself. More details can be found on the Guardianship area of this site.

Termination of Adult Rights and Adoptions. 

If there are major reasons that a parent needs to no longer have an adult relationship with a kid (such as desertion, neglect, abuse, etc.), the family court might terminate that moms and dad’s rights. If someone else wishes to end up being a kid’s legal mom and dad, the family court can give an adoption where the parent-child relationship is legally created. More info is located on the Adoptions and Terminating Parental Rights area of this website.

One reason you may choose to develop an estate plan is to bolster the protection of your assets. Whether you have a small or large amount of assets, asset protection should be a critical part of every estate plan. Distributing your assets to your named loved ones is important to do early in case you are ever incapacitated or pass away. Making the right preparations ahead of time can help you avoid unnecessary legal expenses and save your family from dealing with a complex legal situation. An experienced estate planning lawyer can explain to you about your options for keeping your assets safe and secure. 

What are the benefits of an estate plan?

An estate plan is an excellent way to protect your assets from being accessed or handled by the government or individuals you don’t want obtaining your assets. Several benefits that an estate plan offers in regards to your assets include:

• Reducing or avoiding taxes
• Protection from lawsuits
• Protection of assets not covered by insurance

Working with an estate planning lawyer, like one from Klenk Law, can help you identify which of your assets are protected and which aren’t. They can suggest your list of assets and categorize them properly so you reduce the risk of losing them. 

How do you protect assets from creditors?

One method of asset protection that is useful to keep your assets out of reach from creditors is an irrevocable trust. An irrevocable trust is a form of trust where only the beneficiary can give permission to alter its established terms and conditions. When you place your assets in this trust, you give up your authority to control those assets. This type of trust is a popular option among individuals in professions where they are vulnerable to lawsuits, such as law or healthcare. If you have questions about setting up an irrevocable trust, a lawyer can assist you. 

How do you protect assets from divorce?  

To protect your assets from divorce, a lawyer may advise you to create a prenuptial agreement or cohabitation agreement. Trusts such as irrevocable trust or a revocable living trust are also effective in keeping your assets safe. 

The process of forming a robust, comprehensive asset protection plan can be simplified by hiring a competent and respected lawyer who can review your finances and suggest strategies that match your estate planning needs. Learn more about the different methods that can be used in asset protection by consulting with a lawyer.

Divorce Lawyer

The end of any relationship can be difficult, but some breakups are more emotional than others. At times, the tension can escalate into a verbal or physical confrontation. If you or your former spouse must remove belongings from the home, it may be a good choice to hire one of the moving companies to handle this potentially difficult task. When professional movers come on scene and one or both of you are not present, it can defuse the situation. This is provided that there is no contention about who owns which belongings. If you will be present and fear for your personal safety, it may be appropriate to have a law enforcement officer on scene or a neutral friend by your side. If the situation escalates into a confrontation, do your best to step away and make every effort to not respond to your former partner. When hiring the professionals, let them know ahead of time the situation as it stands and what they can anticipate.

Establishing Ownership of Possessions

In advance of the move, it’s important to be clear about who owns what items. Though there may have been verbal agreements at one time, it can come down to who has receipts for which possessions. Receipts are a form of proof and can be more persuasive in court than a memory of a conversation during which time your former partner gave you the object in question. This may not be fair, but by the time your moving company arrives to remove your or your former partner’s belongings, it’s best to have mutual clarity. If the two of you come to an agreement about splitting up your possessions, get the agreement in writing. During this emotional time, it is easy for confusion to develop on both sides and a written agreement can be beneficial to both of you.

Pack in Advance

With a clear, written agreement in place there is no reason not to pack the belongings ahead of time. If this is not possible for some reason, your moving company may offer packing as one of their services. However, understand that it is not their responsibility to step between yourself and your former partner to pack items whose ownership is in question. If possible, move the items to be removed from the home to a central location such as the corner of the garage or a single room. If there are items that need to go to the dump, your moving company may do this for you as long as you provide them with advanced notice. The more organized you are, the faster that the moving company can leave the home, and the sooner you can put this chapter behind you.

Provide Access to the Moving Company

If you will not be present when the movers arrive, make sure they will have access to where they need to pick up the belongings. This may mean leaving a key with a trusted neighbor whose contact information you give to the moving company, or a key hidden in a safe location. Whatever arrangement you make, be sure to have a backup plan in case things do not work out as planned.

Top Divorce Lawyers

We often get questions from parents asking when their child will have a say in court matters. Below are answers to our frequently asked questions regarding the child’s ability to express their desire in court.

What age does my child have to be to decide where they want to live?

In Texas, children 12 years of age and above can tell the judge where they want to live, but the judge does not have to follow the child’s wishes. Many parents assume that the child has the final say and often express that thought process to the child. This is inherently wrong and should not be expressed to the child. Children who are closer in age to 18 will have more say than those closer to 12.

Is it true that a child 12 years of age or older can decide which parent has primary custody?

No. Years ago the Texas Family Code allowed a child age 12 or older to sign a form expressing which parent the child wanted to primarily live with. The Texas Family Code now allows a child 12 years of age or older to express their desire in chambers with the judge. Judges also have the discretion to interview a child under age 12 with regards to whom the child wants to live with.

Can I be present when the Judge interviews my child?

No. Quite often the only people present in the interview are the child and the judge. The judge has the ability to decide if attorneys will be present in the interview but in many cases the attorneys are not present in the interview. Parties also have the ability to request a court reporter be present to record the interview between the judge and child.

What does the judge look for when deciding who my child lives with?

Many judges want to know why the child is deciding the way they are. Children have varying levels of maturity and intelligence. Some like a certain parent because they are the fun parent. Some dislike a parent because they are made to study, clean, and show respect. Judges will assess the situation and decide which household situation is best for the child.

Is it possible to have my child decide which days he/she wants to see the other parent?

In Texas, there is no law that gives the child a role in determining which days they want to be with the other parent. A child can express their wishes to the judge in chambers however, the decision will rest with the judge.

If you or anyone you know has questions pertaining to family law or wishes to have a free 30-minute consultation, please contact an Arlington family lawyer at the Brandy Austin Law Firm. Our attorneys are experienced in handling all types of family law cases including divorce, custody, adoptions and child support.

Thank you for our friends and contributors at Brandy Austin Law Firm, PLLC for their insight into child custody and family law.

Those who are going through a tense divorce, can turn to a divorce lawyer Frisco, TX turns to for some much needed guidance. You may feel worn down by your soon to be former spouse, who is just doing things to either upset you or make things harder than needed. It can be challenging to keep emotions in check, particularly if your ex is acting irrationally and even volatile. It can help to arm yourself with knowledge about the divorce process, to help protect yourself from unfair treatment.

In this article, we have listed four major ways your ex may try to throw low blows your way as you head towards divorce finalization. If your ex makes you feel threatened or unsafe in any way, notify authorities and keep your attorney updated as things unfold.

Wrongful Abuse Allegations

Your former spouse may file an abuse allegation in order to obtain sole legal custody of your children, or force you to move out of the family home. To help prevent this from happening, do not engage in any confrontational or angry conversations with your spouse through phone, email, text messaging or letters. If you receive notice that an antrue abuse allegation has been filed against you, do not react in a way that could make matters worse. Instead, contact your attorney right away for advice.

Hindering Access to Marital Assets

An angry ex spouse may seek revenge against the other by limiting access to money as a form of punishment. A trick to helping prevent this from occurring is to confirm that your name is listed on all the marital assets before officially filing for divorce. Examples of marital assets you may have acquired while together include the following:

• Bank Accounts

• Debit/Credit Card Accounts

• Retirement Fund

• Homes or Real Estate

• Bonds or Stocks

• Insurance

• Pension Plans

• Vehicles or Boats

The Discovery Process

An exceptionally agitated spouse may try to slow things down by refusing to cooperate during the discovery process. Or, your ex may send piles of requests your way in attempt to exhausted you with time-consuming paperwork. An attorney who is familiar with the family court system can use strategies to help keep things moving forward.

Attempting to Dig Up Dirt

Your ex may try to sign onto your Facebook or email accounts, or even hack your phone in an attempt to dig up dirt to be used against you during the divorce. Be aware that what you post on social media could be seen by your ex somehow, even if you have your settings on private.

Thank you to our friends and contributors at Scroggins Law Group for their insight into family law and divorce.

Child custody can take many shapes and forms. Some agreements are made in mediation and other times it will take a Family Court judge to make the ultimate decision on who will get custody of the child[ren]. It is  also possible for both parents to reach a custody agreement before a court hearing; therefore, wishing to close the case. The following information is generalized, but explains how a child custody case is closed when a private agreement is made.

Closing a Child Custody Case

If your current child custody case has been in mediation, with or without a child custody lawyer, you should call the mediator (or lawyer) and let them know that a settlement has been reached. At this point, the mediator may ask both of you to sit down and explain the agreement to him or her. Any necessary suggestions or changes may be discussed, and after the mediator may help you to filing a motion to close the case. It is likely that the mediator will recommend you to create a solid parenting plan to present the judge with to show him or her that any important details have been covered.

The only person who can close the case is the party who initially filed the petition for custody. So if you originally filed the case, you or your lawyer should file a motion to close it.

When a Private Child Custody Agreement Becomes Legally Binding

If both parents have came to a private agreement regarding child custody, a lawyer may draw up and file a stipulation that lists the agreement. A judge will then review it and sign it; making it legally binding.

It is not uncommon for one parent to agree to the child custody arrangement, but then fail to adhere to their end of the deal. In this situation, you may need to refile the child custody case. This process could include you having to call upon a legal advocate, paying new court fees, and retrace steps you might already be familiar with. If you have any doubts beforehand as to whether or not the other party will hold up to their responsibilities, you should not pursue a motion to close.

Before You Take Your Proposed Plan to a Judge, Talk With a Lawyer First

As confident as you might be in your new parenting agreement made privately between you and other parent of your child, you should first talk with a lawyer to determine what is the right move to make regarding your personal set of circumstances. By remaining patient, and exploring all of your options and possible outcomes to your decisions, you grant yourself the ability to understand the situation in its fullest. Furthermore, it could save you from future financial losses and stress in the event your private agreement does not work out. To learn more about private child custody agreements, you should discuss your case with an experienced family lawyer Bloomington, IL residents trust.

Thank you to our friends and contributors at Pioletti & Pioletti for their insight into child custody and family law.

After getting officially divorced from your spouse, you may be wondering about other kinds of documents that need updating. While people try to update their estate plan every few years or so, it may need to be done sooner if a significant life event arises. It is not uncommon for spouses to appoint their other half with duties such as power of attorney, will executor or leaving them a substantial portion of assets. If you do not want your former spouse to get any of your assets or be in charge of them after you pass on, you may want to perform a full review of your estate plan before you forget.

In the article here, we have gone into further detail about things to consider when updating your estate plan documents to remove your ex spouse’s name.

The Importance of Editing Your Will

A will is a very influential document within the estate plan, that can have a huge impact on how your assets are handled in the future. In your will are instructions and wishes for how you would like your estate to be divided up after you have passed away. Do not assume that once you are officially divorced from your spouse, that his or her name is automatically removed from your will or other documents. You actually have to destroy the old will, and create an entirely new one. It is not uncommon for people to reach out to their attorney for guidance when starting from scratch. If it has been some time since your original will was created, you may need a refresher.

Who You Assigned as Will Executor

Many people choose their significant other as their will executor. This may be one of the most important roles of your estate plan. Depending on your relationship with your former spouse now, you may or may not want to appoint someone else as your will executor. Do keep in mind that the person you choose as will executor may have to perform the following duties:

• Arranging your funeral

• Paying debts and taxes from your estate

• Distributing assets to beneficiaries as written

• Submitting a request for probate, if needed

• Protecting your assets

• Getting appraisals for belongings

• Notifying banks, government agencies and credit companies of your passing

• Creating a bank account to handle incoming funds and pay continuing bills

Emotional Turmoil

Even if you and your former spouse agreed that divorce was the right decision, you may be devastated. It can be difficult to think about reviewing your estate plan during this time of grief and healing. It can be immensely challenging for people to eliminate their former spouse from an estate plan in the midst of this heartbreak. But, you have to ask yourself if you still want this person to receive part of your assets or be in charge of them, after you pass away. Seeking support from your Sacramento estate planning lawyer about these needed changes, can help you get through the task a bit easier.

Thank you to our friends and contributors at Yee Law Group for their knowledge about beneficiaries and estate planning.

Veterans of the United States may be eligible for a broad range of programs and services provided by the Department of Veterans Affairs (also known as VA Benefits). Eligibility for most VA benefits are based upon discharge from active military service with the exception of dishonorable discharge conditions. It is always suggested to consult with an Arlington family lawyer to see if you or your spouse are eligible for benefits.

The VA offers a broad range of programs and services for our Veterans. Some of the programs include Healthcare benefits. These benefits usually include inpatient hospital care and outpatient services to not only promote, but preserve and or restore the Veterans health.  The VA medical facilities provide a wide range of services such as surgery, critical care, mental health, orthopedics, pharmacy, radiology and even physical therapy. There are additional benefits such as assistance with prescriptions, healthy living, weight loss, vaccinations, post-traumatic stress disorder programs and therapy, suicide prevention, traumatic brain injuries, long term care and geriatric care or even military sexual trauma assistance.

In order to qualify for VA benefits you must be an Active Military service member or have been discharged from the military on good standing. Active Military service members means full-time service, other than active duty for training, and must be a member of the Army, Navy, Air Force, Marine Corps, Coast Guard, or as a commissioned officer of the Public Health Service, Environmental Science Services Administration or National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration, or its predecessor, or the Coast and Geodetic Surveys.

If you meet these requirements some of the benefits that you could receive would include Disability Compensation, Special Monthly Compensation, Special Compensation Claims, Veterans’ Pension and Aid & Attendance and Housebound Attendance. The VA also offers assistance with Education and Training, home loans, insurance, Vocational Rehabilitation and Employment, Career Opportunities, Financial Counseling, Fiduciary Services and even Mortgage delinquency assistance.

The VA provides memorial and allowances to help reimburse burial costs for  a Veteran and or his or her dependents. Burial benefits include a burial at a National cemetery, an inscribed headstone, marker or medallion, an allowance to partially reimburse the burial and funeral costs of a Veteran. These services include a Presidential Memorial Certificate and an American flag that drapes over the Veterans casket. Some additional memorial benefits include Military Funeral Honors, Burial Flags, Burial Allowances and Survivor’s benefits.

If you or someone you know would like more information on whether or not you qualify for VA benefits, please contact the Brandy Austin Law Firm to schedule your free consultation today.

Thank you to our friends and contributors from Brandy Austin Law Firm, PLLC for their insight into benefits and veterans.